In April I said, “It’s time to lose my last 5lbs of baby weight”. In May I said, “No, seriously, it’s time”. In June I’m saying, “Only 2 or 3 more pounds…”. Well here I am, half way through June still trying to lose the last bit that back in April I was envisioning being gone by now. What’s holding me back? A few things, and I’ll put them out there right now to be honest with myself. One, not devoting enough time to me. It’s the same old sob story, two kids, a job (if you can call working 4 hours a day a job), a husband, a house, etc. etc. But I’ll be darned if the weekends come and I don’t trade a 20 minute hill running workout for family bed time and yard work during nap time. So, every weekend comes along and I tell myself, just 20 minutes for me and I somehow manage to find other things to do with my “free time”. Second, Plantain Chips, those dirty dirty plantain chips. I love them, my 2 year old loves them, it’s my one and only “treat”. It has to stop, no one should eat Plantain Chips or any kind of chips every day or every other day. I must break the habit! Lastly, obsessing. It’s a real killer and as a woman it’s just what we do. I obsess over how my stomach looks, how much sleep I’m not getting, about raising happy healthy kids, about cleaning up the house, about actually cooking a meal, about what we are going to do this weekend, about getting anywhere on time, about sending out birthday cards before said birthdays actually occur, about remembering to pay that medical bill, about getting groceries, about doing the laundry, about the workouts I’m doing (or not doing). If I give myself too much time I’ll obsess, stress, and get anxiety over just about anything. It’s like I always tell my husband, “Once you become a Mom you just can’t turn Mom off… ever.” It’s my job to worry, plan, care for, and put forth my best effort on all fronts for my family. But that also means I lose much of myself in being things for others. It’s about balance and I should probably find mine!
Any who, those are just my excuses. I’m sure I could come up with many more but those are the ones that are the big cripplers, not just in losing my last 3lbs but in just relaxing and living my life. Let it go, live in the now, just be. If only I could listen to myself.
So what holds you back? What holds you back from achieving your goals (fitness or otherwise)? What holds you back from feeling successful? What holds you back from being happy with yourself? What holds you back from feeling content?
Here is my advice on getting past it all one step at a time. Although, I’m obviously still working on it all myself so perhaps I’m not the guru you should totally invest in : )
1. Outline your goals.
2. Don’t make goals just to make goals, make goals that mean something to you.
3. Don’t let yourself off the hook, be accountable, failure is not failure if you try.
4. Be honest. Be honest with yourself, be honest with your family, be honest with your friends. If you really care about your goals the only way to get there is to be honest. NO MORE EXCUSES 5. Understand what it is holding you back and how to either cope with those things or come up with healthy ways to move past the road blocks.
6. Look on the bright side. We are always looking at the negatives but maybe instead of saying, “I didn’t run 20 miles every week like I planned, I’m a loser” you can say, “Well I didn’t quite get 20 miles but I got 15 and that is pretty good. Next week is a new week.”
It’s not easy to feel like you are losing the battle, like you’ve failed, like you are never going to accomplish something. But not trying, being complacent and living in a way that does not make you happy is much worse than the possibility of failing.
So while I stare at the scale (I’m not even a scale person for crying out loud) and think, “I’m so far away from losing these last few pounds, I’m never going to be able to do it” I instead will tell myself, “Good job, good effort, I traded my normal looking stomach for two beautiful children and that was the best trade ever!”. I’ll remember the positive and continue to work at my goals. Perhaps I’ll stop obsessing about my wobbly bits and start obsessing about something a little more healthy and worth my time. I’m open to suggestions here!
In the end, life is too short to obsess over stupid things. Life is too short to hold yourself back. It’s time to stop sitting on the sidelines. It’s time to join the game, you don’t have to be the best player just getting on the field is a great start! So get out of your comfort zone, try something new, break the cycle, form a new habit (a good one please), you can do it, don’t hold yourself back!